
A Modest Agony
A Modest Agony is a 13-minute psychodrama that examines divergent approaches to childhood trauma, through the lens of two irreconcilable brothers.
Project
A Modest Agony
LOGLINE:
Cam and Mac were each other’s constants; as adults they have drifted. It takes the recent passing of their mother for them to be reunited. Picking at the scabs of their trauma in the cottage in Kent they once called home, patched-up memories bleed anew…
STORY:
Cam has been writing a memoir, taking ownership of his childhood trauma as a means of coming to terms with it. In the wake of his mother’s death, Cam is forced to confront the place of his trauma outside of the comforting constructs of his memoir. Here he finds himself face to face with his older brother, who takes a quite opposite approach to the trauma.
Mac had been his guardian, a voice telling him to bury his head in the sand, to dissociate, forget or bottle up the memories. At first, he appears calm, collected and the voice of reason. Wouldn’t it just be easier to suppress the memories, to forget and move on?
Mac would rather efface the memories of his trauma than go through the painful process of confronting them, but this approach is no comfort to Cam any more. If he wants to be able to move onto a new chapter, he must write his truth.

DIRECTOR’S STATEMENT:
As a History and Modern Languages graduate specialising in memory culture and Vergangenheitsbewältigung, I’ve long taken an interest in why some things are forgotten and others remembered. This interest has informed the themes I tend to write about, and influenced the creation of my screenwriting and directorial debut short LATE (2023).
Many of my favourite films are ones which, might depict a circumstance that one has no direct lived experience of yet speaks to universally human themes that will resonate and, stay with the audience beyond the confines of the film’s runtime. A Modest Agony doesn’t concern itself so much with details of the trauma itself, rather, it focuses on the process of psychological exploration when dealing with memories of a traumatic past, be that through suppressing, reframing or directly confronting those memories.
When James presented me with an early draft of A Modest Agony, I was particularly impressed by the tension and authenticity he builds between the brothers, with a striking twist that catches the reader unawares. I considered this uniquely grave manifestation of trauma-induced psychosis an insightful framework through which to observe the human mind reconciling with old scars.
Albeit under more torturous circumstances than many viewers are likely to have endured, it is hoped that this film will prompt viewers to reflect on their own, personal experiences of coming to terms with troubling episodes of their lives.
– Anton Allende-Blaubach, Director
SCREENWRITER’S STATEMENT:
As part of my Creative Writing Masters I took a module on Creative Non-Fiction. During an exercise on memoir-writing, I was encouraged to pour unfiltered, deeply-buried fragments of memory onto the page. Focusing on the craft of my writing, freed from the constraints of my own judgment and present viewpoints, I experienced a cathartic process, where I was able to learn from and come to terms with my younger self through self-observation. This seminal moment in the development of this project coincided with my research into Freud’s essay “Creative Writers and Day Dreaming”. This birthed an exploration into the form of daydreaming most commonly associated with childhood: the imaginary person. Freud contends that all creative writing comes from the fulfilment of childhood fantasies, personal dissatisfaction and the sating of ego.
Within, A Modest Agony Cam relapses into this childlike form of daydreaming to comfort himself when contending with his trauma once more. The trauma of losing his mother, and the unspooling of long-suppressed memories in the process of writing his memoir lead to his childhood coping mechanisms re-emerging and the words he wrote on the page haunting him and reaching off the page into his present reality. A voice representing his own self-doubt as to the veracity of his memories and indeed, whether his own intentions are really as pure as he wants them to be.
– James Bryden Rodgers, Screenwriter
STYLISTIC APPROACH:

As a tale about self-discovery, introspection and personal growth, A Modest Agony can be regarded as a visceral coming-of-age film with horror undertones that speak to the trauma that plagues our protagonist. It is important that these themes are consistent across all aspects of the filmmaking, as outlined below:
Cinematography:
The majority of the film takes place inside the cottage. These interior shots will comprise of locked off, voyeuristic frames, taking inspiration from Yasujiro Ozu’s pillow shots. The stillness of these observational shots will establish the canvas on which we build the eerie tension between protagonist and antagonist.
We’ll be opting for a black & white look, using considered blocking and chiaroscuro lighting to play into the dichotomy of Cam and Mac’s personas. The backlit profile shots, silhouettes, blocking and framing as seen in La Notte, Persona and Manhattan are key references here. (Budget-dependent) we will shoot on 16mm film with the magical quality of the 1.66:1 aspect ratio: a striking, textured and memorable look to reflect how indelibly this episode of nostalgia and trauma will remain in the mind of our protagonist and also, it is hoped, in the mind of the viewer.
In the exterior scenes where we step outside of the house, the characters more freely air out their differences. This freedom to express themselves outside of the suffocating confines of the cottage is reflected in a looser filming style, with scope for handheld shots to unsettle and disorient the viewer in a way that is reflective of Cam’s own psychological torment.
Editing:
Memory is invariably selective and fragmented. As the protagonist’s exploration of traumatic memories unfolds, we will look to splinter select scenes in the edit to jar and unsettle the viewing experience, reflecting the distressing process of rehashing memories of trauma.
French New Wave cinema is certainly a divisive style of filmmaking. But whether you like the editing style in films like À bout de souffle or not, it undoubtedly makes for an unusual and disorienting watch. As such, it feels befitting of A Modest Agony.
Sound & Music:
We want the music and sound design to add to the immersive psychological experience for the viewer. It should be an ambient composition that is complimentary to the other aspects of our creative approach, without being overbearing. Carefully considered sound design has a great capacity to tease and pull at viewers’ nerves and emotions subconsciously. This is something we will be taking into account throughout the filmmaking process to ensure it engrosses rather than distracts the viewer.
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